Thursday, August 5, 2010

Epic Douchebaggery

Achtung, this video is not suitable for work or play:


So, you've watched the clip and now maybe you're thinking, "Why? Why would you choose to share this girl's performance with friends you supposedly care about? With strangers even? You're not a good person, Rennie." The only semi-reasonable defense I have is: it's fascinating, isn't it? Watch it a few times. Allow it to claw against your brainpan. No sarcasm here: I'm drawn to this video in the same way that I'm obsessed with Thomas Kinkade paintings and Howard Roark monologues and all things that ring so absolutely totally fucking hollow that you can't help but respect them, almost.

I'm jealous that I'll never be as blindly self-assured and confident in my art as the girl in this video. I don't foresee a day when I'll stand in front of a well-manicured audience, bravely spurting nefarious liquids from my vagina. And I think we can all agree that this is a good thing. Finally, insecurity works in my favor! It's comforting to know exactly who you don't want to be, even if you're not entirely sure who you are. You know?

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