Thursday, May 13, 2010

Non Sequiturs: Because I’m Lazy

1. I’m typing this in a café. Let’s be clear: it’s not a cool café; there are no T. Rex songs playing and none of the baristas have full sleeve tattoos. Actually, there’s only one barista: she’s Vietnamese and was born sometime in the antediluvian period. The coffee here costs less than a dollar, the radio is playing 80’s power ballads, and the whole place smells like the YMCA. I like to come here because nobody comes here. Well, almost nobody. At the moment it’s just me and two other customers. They’re a hetero couple. The man has bulging, wide set eyes that give him a mantis-like head and his lady-companion has the body of a Yukon Gold potato. They’re currently holding hands and talking and looking pretty solidly in love. It’s a beautiful thing to witness.

2. I saw The Tallest Man On Earth last Sunday. Ironically, his big raspy voice emanates from a petite, matchstick skeletal frame. I have never seen skinnier jeans on skinnier legs. He did a cover of Graceland in honor of his Mother (it was Mother’s Day). Then he sang some Sade and when he was finished he said, “That wasn’t supposed to be funny.” I am in love with him.

3. If you are looking for catharsis,
here’s the button you press if you want to delete your Facebook account.

4. Werner Herzog reads "Where's Waldo?"

From Herzog's Wikipedia biography:

“In January 2006 actor Joaquin Phoenix overturned his car on a road above Sunset Boulevard. Herzog, who lived nearby, helped him get out of it. A few days later, while giving an interview to Mark Kermode for the BBC, an unknown individual shot Herzog with an air rifle during filming. Herzog continued the interview and showed his wound on camera but acted as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened, remarking, "It is not a significant bullet."

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