Monday, May 3, 2010

Lala No No

This hurts me so much.

I'm finally over the whole "NO! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? SHUT UP! SHUT UP! OH MY GOD SHUT UP! WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS? NO! NO, STOP IT!" phase of my grief, and I'm ready to take a step back and look at this horrible event in internet history.

Apparently Apple bought Lala a while ago, which I didn't know, and they chose this moment in time to close it down. My guess: they sat back and let Lala work on perfecting their own service, and now Apple's just gonna rip that model and use it for an updated iTunes.com.

One of the main reasons I liked Lala was the ability to access my iTunes library from any browser, which I later found out is called "cloud-storage." So I guess it makes sense that iTunes would want their own version of that. Whatever, good for them for joining us here in the future.

But Lala was so much simpler and cheaper than the iTunes store. They didn't have any of that fancy "pre-order today and get a not-so-free music video" that iTunes does. When a new album is released, they post it. And you could listen to the whole thing before deciding if you want to buy it or not.

Conventional wisdom might say "if they're listening for free, they're gonna buy less!" but that's not what I've found. Looking at my Lala purchasing history, I've definitely been buying more music more regularly than I have in the past, thanks to their service that allows me to fully explore new artists and their cheaper prices.

I also loved the shit out of their recommendation feature, which let me easily send songs and albums to my friends. I've always loved turning people on to new music, and a service that makes it simpler and free was literally too good to be true.

So step the fuck up, Apple. You just stole the future from the internet, and it makes you super lame. You're crushing the little guy, which seems like a pretty Windows thing to do. That's right, I said it.

Usually you're really good at making new and shiny things that I want, but this time you took something I already had and shrieked "mine!" like some sort of jealous preschooler. So if you're gonna adapt Lala into your own smooth-titanium version, then the least you could do is speed it along, okay? Daddy needs his fix.

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